I'm now ready to start anew. Not because I have erased something or someone from my life, but it just so happened that there was a change in category. I just transfered him from one spot in my heart to another.
We had lunch together, because we both wanted to see if we're ok. We both wanted to reassure ourselves that we can both continue with our lives, but in a newfound respect and a new kind of love for each other, as friends. I'm really very happy because we both wanted that we remain friends, I'm very happy because we met halfway.
We cleared out some things also, amid teasings and laughter, and in the end, all is good. The slates were clean, the new relationship spotless. He thanked me, I thanked him. We shared a big chunk of our lives together, and that can't be easily forgotten. All is well, and will be better - in due time.
I'm happy also because I can see that he's happy right now. We don't have regrets, I didn't regret anything that happened between the two of us, during the 5-year-relationship even up to the process of ending it. Well, sure, there are some things I couldn't help but think "If only's" or "what if's", but at the end of the day, it really seems that what happened may really have been the best for the both of us. God has reasons and purposes that as of now, He alone knows and understands, but there will come a time that I and he, will know these and understand and maybe be thankful after all. We do not hold our lives in our hands, our present nor our future, but we can always try to work things out with God's help and grace.
I'm happy - I just don't really fully understand why, but deep inside, I know, believe and feel that all will be well. I'm not being hypocritical, but really, I'm happy. For him and also for myself, that we are in good terms, and we parted ways as good friends. We gave each other a hug and saw each other go.
I told him he's always welcome in my house, welcome to email, to SMS, to call me if he has problems or whatsoever, or just text or send non-sense messages or anything like that, and I really meant that; with all my heart. You were, and always will be a part of my life.
Thank you. So much. For sharing yourself and your life with me. God bless and always take care of yourself.
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