Why, why, why...De Lima?!?

"My my my Delilah,

Why why why Delilah"

Change Delilah to De Lima and it still fits well enough. Hahaha.

Honestly, I liked De Lima when she was still with CHR. But when she became the acting secretary of DOJ, something was off. There was a change in her demeanor, a change in the way she carries herself, even in hoe she conveys her thoughts, which were previously so clear, structured and does not worry about political correctness. And the more she advanced in her senatorial race, the stranger she seemed to me.

But now, especially now with this tiff with the highest ranking person in the government -- who is so sure about himself and confident as a mafia boss (can't use the term I want to use because it has expletives!) because of course, as a lawyer he knows he can get away with anything at this point in his life -- De Lima is acting sooo... what's the word...childish. Even with words of a diplomat and diction of an orator, the act is still so childish. Brandishing her "courage to fight the big guy", but looking like the bully who got knocked down by the wimp in gym class, so hurt and gunning for revenge.

"I like her" is not a phrase apt for this situation anymore. It's more of... "You should have known what you're getting yourself into."

And just as I refreshed my facebook home page to load the newsfeed, this catches my attention:

credits to Rappler fb page.

Well, you're going to be very, very busy. Good luck.

-_-

FINDING FULFILLMENT IN WORK

Started another reading plan in my bible app. Yes, keyword - STARTED. I literally start them, but could not last too many days, somewhat lose interest, and not end. Same with the topic at hand - work. I most of the time start something, only to not have it end the way I would like to.

Maybe because I'm a crammer. I live for cramming. Been doing this since high school, carried it over to college, and prolly have it embedded in my system already. I procrastinate up 'til I need to burn all my energy to catch a deadline. Maybe it's the rush, and the feeling of success when I finish the task. Which only means one thing. I'm not passionate enough with my work. Shame. Shame. Shame.

Yes it's a shame for Christians like me. To not be working like the best steward I should be. Yes. How could I be entrusted with big things when I waste my time and effort doing nothing and busting my brains to cram for the small things.

Because I don't find it fulfilling anymore. I don't know when I also felt so fulfilled with my work since so far, I have been looking at it as a means of survival. Means to fund my hunger, my need for shelter, my want of a comfortable life, my whims. Well, it has changed a little over time. Added reasons are my daughters. For their survival and for their comfortable life. Fulfillment still out of the equation.

Conclusion: I have to find something. Something that will make me feel fulfilled. More than just being told I need to work like Jesus is my boss. Because honestly, it only made me feel guilty. But not enough to push me to work harder, or be proud of what I'm doing.